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Archive for December 2007

Cobrador

December 31, 2007

Remember Roy King Cobra? No you don’t, because you only read about overpriced lampposts, and overpriced computers, and minimum wage increases, and the Ban-Tal traffic and those other stories that “really matter.” You don’t have time for topics that have to do with the ubiquitous snake, unless one happens to be holding a public office. […]

It’s the police, ho ho ho

December 29, 2007

The PNP organization has issued a memorandum to all its units nationwide that police officers must don the Santa Claus outfit when on duty, especially when doing raids and patrols. The PNP believes criminals behave like children at the sight of jolly old Santa: instead of running away from the authorities, they run towards them […]

Gravity-producing toilet for Aussie astronauts

December 29, 2007

WHILE you were busy guessing the name of the next typhoon, or whether Jack Jakosalem deserved to be the next Ernie Baron, the rest of the world was holding conferences everywhere on an issue that is of greater universal significance: the toilet. Last Thursday in Seoul, the World Toilet Association held its first major gathering […]

Umbrella… ella… eh

December 29, 2007

I will have to be honest with you here, dear readers, and I trust you to keep my secrets safe in your hearts. So don’t pass this around. I have a severe case of identity crisis such that I avoid carrying with me things that will cast doubt about my gender. I’m talking about umbrellas. […]

Flowerpuff boys

December 28, 2007

WHEN we were kids, little toughies in the neighborhood, flowers symbolized everything boys were not. Flowers were a girl thing. We didn’t want to be seen near anything that resembled a petal or smelled sweet. Once, my friends followed me to the backyard, worried if I was out to gather gumamelas, only to find out, […]